there is a light

When my grandmother was a young woman, she fell deeply in love with a guy named Joey. They married, and just a few days later, Joey left for the war and never returned. My grandma told me that she awoke one night, and her bedroom was dark except for Joey’s picture, which was illuminated on her dresser. She later learned that evening was the same night Joey died.

Years later, she was at a parade with her family and noticed a bright flash of light in the sky. When they returned home, my grandma learned that her brother died. Whenever my Grandma saw a light flashing that wasn’t supposed to be, she got a bad feeling, and I guess it passed on to the rest of the family.

When I was in college, the key ring my Grandma gave me broke in two. I had never taken it off because I felt it was some way connected to her. I was upset that it broke, and when my mom called and told me she thought something was wrong with Grandma, I responded, “I know.”

She was in Chicago visiting family, and she didn’t feel well, so she decided to come back to town early. I saw my grandma that weekend, and my mom even told her about the key ring, which I had fixed. Within a week, my key ring broke again, this time, for good. My mom called later and said that Grandma was in the hospital. She died a few days later.

To this day, when I see a light flickering out, I think of my Grandma. It used to really upset me – like it was a sign that someone I loved was dying. One day, I thought, what if it’s my grandma’s way of contacting me and letting me know that everything is OK? I immediately felt better – the power of the mind.

Last Monday, I took Thor to the vet because he seemed to be getting worse. He had taken nearly all of his antibiotics, and the mass on his neck -- what the vet diagnosed as a severe bacterial infection -- seemed even larger. Dr. Chesnick said the mass had spread to his mouth, and there was nothing they could do to make it better. I didn’t need to wait for the biopsy results; Dr. Chesnick recommended Thor be put to sleep within a day or two so they could leave the catheter in his paw and he wouldn’t have to go through that pain again.

That night was rough. I gave Thor peanut butter on a bagel – a favorite of his. I would have given him anything he wanted because we had only a few hours left together. My dad drove us to the vet the next morning, and we stayed with Thor through the procedure. It was heartbreaking, but I’m glad I was there. Right before he lost consciousness, Thor licked my nose. He knew I needed that.



A few days later, Dr. Chesnick called and said the biopsy results showed that Thor had a highly evasive something carcinoma. It was cancer, and he was really sick. I'm grateful that I was able to spend his last few hours with him.

By the way, the staff at the Kirkman Road Veterinary Clinic has been wonderful. Dr. Chesnick is a sweetheart, and I highly recommend the place to anyone looking for a kind, understanding vet practice.